Parenthood in relation to the children who have left Home and became independent is a completely different kind of parenthood. This is the time of pride, of becoming parents-in-law (?), grandparents, advisors…
Sometimes it is the time of confronting life which is entirely different from our expectations: abandoning faith, choices we’re not able to accept, rejection, resentment which we do not deserve…
And yet, whenever I talk to parents like those, I always admire their infinite love, patience and hope that their children will find the right path, that they’ll stop rebelling and return to faith.
Thanks to them I come to a better understanding of the love of God, who never turns away from his child – especially the one who got lost.
My special prayer is with you, dear Parents who suffer when you witness the choices of your children. Your children are also the children of God, who loves them even more than you do.
“The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17)
“At that time Mary got ready and hurried to a town in the hill country of Judea, where she entered Zechariah’s home and greeted Elizabeth. When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb.” (Luke 1:39-41)
Yes, every new human being, though as small as a poppy seed, deserves singing with joy over them. Even if the baby is a surprise for its parents, even if it finds its mum not ready – being accepted expresses his or her deepest and primary need. When that need isn’t satisfied, as the experience of many people shows, they are left with a painful crack for the rest of their lives.
You can say: sometimes it’s too difficult, greeting new life within oneself. Because it seems to be coming in the worst possible moment in a woman’s life, when she has no support – or even is suffering violence – from the near ones. And yet the little person is desperately begging for love. For not being rejected. Because he or she feels deeply the pain of rejection; it fills them with horror.
And so much depends on the fathers: to give a woman, who is just becoming the mother of their children, a sense of safety. When she feels loved and protected, she will announce to the whole world that a new human being has just started happening!
And even if deserted by everyone, she can always remember that God himself, “the Mighty Warrior”, takes her under His protection – the first one to feel the pain of her isolation, the first – to admire her motherhood. And He will take care of everything.
We tend to associate Creighton Model with an aid in infertility treatment. But CREIGHTON MODEL FertilityCare™ System – is something more. It’s the expression of care for the other person’s whole life. The care for their health together with the truth of his or her vocation. Health is necessary not only for a woman who wants to be a mum. Also a consecrated woman, a young girl, an elderly lady, a mum of five.
The care for a woman’s health, but also caring for getting to know thoroughly the truth of her sexuality. I lookat the lecturers with amazement. They are not only very competent specialists, but also people of great respect for others. Owing to that respect for another person – thetraining takes so long (13 months) and finishes with a very difficult exam.
You can give the others hope only if it’s grounded in truth and solid knowledge.
I look with no lesser amazement at the course participants. I’ve spent the whole week with them. I listened to their confessions and the stories of the hard times they are given by their colleagues. I prayed together with them and we had meals together. I’ve grown close to them, because we hare the same values. We were like a one big family.
Today they had their serious – though not final – exam. They stayed up late at the tables in all the lecture rooms. A German and a Polish woman were studying hard together, Pablo – from Cuba – with his wife, a group from Mexico and Latin America were revising their knowledge in Spanish, and the doctors were going through dr Hilger’s several-hundred-page long book. The seem to be learning for the exam, but in reality – they all see their patients in their mind: there is this woman who’s waiting for help, as she’s been dealing with the infertility problem for dozen years or so, there’s this girl, who’s in pain due to excessive bleeding, there is finally this wife who experiences extremely difiicult PMS (so does her husband – together with her).
In a while we’ll take part in the Eucharist. I would love to tell them that I admire them and that their effort will be awarded in Eternity.
“Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for Me.” (Matthew 25:40)
Time seemed to be passing much too fast last Sunday. Our Community had its monthly meeting, but I also had my after-hours call duty. So while the others were adoring our Lord Jesus in the Holy Sacrament, I was stitching up a dog’s paw. Fortunately, the fate was on my side later and I could take part in the Eucharist together with the others. Such is life: you have to fight to secure time for God.
I spent the evening with my wife taking the opportunity to reflect on my life. We watched “Courageous” by Alex Kendrick. The movie was great, we enjoyed it a lot. And I could reconsider, for another time, what kind of father I am. Because the film is addressed to the men called to fatherhood.
In one of the first scenes we’re given data which account for a direct link between the quality of the father-child relationship and the juvenile crime rate. “I know your shift work’s hard (…), but when you clock out, go home and love your families” – one of the characters says.
There is no coincidence – it was the Feast of St Joseph the next day. Being a father is not easy, but the guardian of Jesus sets the example. Just like me, he worked hard to earn his family’s living – but he never forgot he was a husband and a father. And he chose to be obedient to God in whatever he did.
As he was silent on the pages of the Gospel, so does he remain in his support for our family. He is silent, but very effective.
St Joseph, the head of the Holy Family, protect us!