The other day I went to the cinema to see “Mud” (USA 2013). In choosing the film I took a blind shot, so to speak; I guess if I’d known before how difficult that movie was, I’d have waited for the newest “Star Trek”. It is a difficult film, because with the eyes of a 14-year-old boy we watch the world in which adults just fail to be what they were meant to.

When the boy’s father says that he and his mother are going to file for divorce, the boy expresses his deeply-rooted natural belief that in marriage people should love and support each other. “That is not so obvious,” his dad replies, thus declaring the bankruptcy of the relationship with his wife, and – for the boy – announcing the end of his own safe world.

There are more noteworthy secenes. For example, when the father and mother are trying to prove to their son who is more to blame, who’s worse in their marriage. And they don’t see that their child couldn’t care less about that, because his world collapses the moment their unity breaks. Or the scenes in which you see that they’re so overwhlemed by their own problems that they don’t find time to continue the conversation with their son beyond the brief “are you hungry?” or “where’s that black eye from?”.

So much depends on us, adults, parents – no matter how “incompetent” we sometimes feel in that role. And it’s not only important what and how we act seperately, but what we create together as a couple.

M

One mother told me about the great joy she experienced when she saw her youngest sons’ reaction to the view of the sea. They were so shocked and so moved, that they were not able to find any proper form to express rupture. They ran back and forth between the water and their Mum. And then they saw the ships on the sea – and again were thrilled.

Thanks to children we are given the chance to experience again the joy of things we’ve got used to.

This is the truth taken straight from the Gospel: “Unless you become like little children…”

Reatreat is also the time to feel again the thrill of things that have become ordinary and known. To refresh the way we look at each other and to use simple gestures – which maybe only need to be aired with the wind from the sea.

Remembering you in my heart,

Fr Jay

Group 1 slowly begins their retreat in our retreat house at the seaside – the House of the Holy Family. Participants have been coming here since Saturday. As the school year in Poland hasn’t finished yet, the retreat is intended for a group of families with small children who don’t go to school yet. So you can see toddlers and babies everywhere. The pace is slower, because many of them require to be looked after round-the-clock, but even the older ones need constant attention. In the chapel the parents are trying to keep the children close, and the children – to get as much free space as possible. In the dining room the parents struggle to feed the kids before the ones who can already walk set off for the next exploratory journey on their own.

Most of the wives present here normally stay at home to take care of the children, and most of the husbands spend most of their time at work. Now that the family can be all day together, the fathers are besieged by their children. You can hear every now and then: Daddy, daddy, look! come! help me!

Time stops at evening Adorations. Children, after playing outside all day, fall asleep quicker, making it possible for their mums and dads to take a moment of prayer. It is particularly moving to see the husbands and fathers pray. How precious this time is. What a beautiful sight. I offer them to St Joseph.

Fr Jay

We have already written about the preparations to build the great boat.

Twenty-odd families from the Wrocław Group but some families that trusted us so much as to join our team for the first time, came in the morning of Corpus Christi to Wisełka to set up a new playground in the retreat centre that hosts us kindly every year and witnesses so many miracles in our lives.

It is such a great joy for us that this project has come to fruition precuisely on the Children’s Day. A year ago one of us, Jack Jacket, said to us: Let’s do something like this because they do so much for us. He said so and took resposibility for his words. It took sa many months to to the planning, designing, buying materials, preparing intermediate products as far as 500 km from the sea so that the work could be finished in two days… The we drove with the bus rented by Jack and with the truck that carried 2 tons of wood. And only 2 days for the work.

The men woke up at 6:30 am. They were divied into several teams and had to plan their work so that everything went well as a whole.
At the Mass celebrating the Children’s Day there were so many reasons for joy. The bons of friendship between us work well in working together. We know that we can count on each other. We can cede the leadership because not everyone has to be a leader but we all need to serve with our ideas and gifts. Thanks to this wonderful adventure we felt again a family of families where we feel well.
God blessed this effort with good weather. Today in the morning a flood began but we have an Ark:).

… conquered.

I am starting off with my borrowed car, with the steering wheel on the right-hand side. It is helpful that all cars are like that. But I feel strange. Attention at the right side, they have priority, also on the roundabouts, Speed in cities – 5o km/h, outside the city – 100 km/h unless indicated otherwise. First motorway 1, then 2 and then main road 27. I left Aucklad in rain but the sun soon began to shine, like it should during the holidays. The destination is Hobbition in the Matamata region. I park in th e city centre and leave for an almost 3 hours’ guided trip.

We leave with the bus at 11.45, only to change for the next one about half an hour later – we go to the farm of Alexander brothers, where Hobbiton was built – first for the Lord of the Rings and then for the Hobbit.

It’s here that Peter Jackson in Septermebr 1998 found a place that ideally fit the vision of Middle Earth as described by Tolkien: hills, lake and the party tree. In March 1999 the army of New Zealdn came to this place to prepare it for the arrival of the film crew of 400 people. Roads, technical infrastructure andbuildings were needed. It took them 9 months. In December 1999 filming began that took 3 months.

It is really a giant undertaking. I take a lot of pictures but I know that they will not do justice to reality. When I look at the houses, I remember the scenes from the film. This is where the journey began, up there Sam met his daughter who ran to meet him, down here Gandalf travelled with his trolley, it’s here that Bilbo spoke on his birthday and disappeared.

The guide poses some theological questions. I make a short speech to the group who listen attentively. I remind them that Tolkien was an ardent Catholic. Let them know how much they owe to the Catholic church.

It’s time to go back. But it was worth having a look. To be continued. Now I move southwards. where a big cmmunity of native inhabitants of New Zealand, Maoris, live.

So long
Father Jarosław

My stay in New Zealand begins with a small acclimatiziation. Last night, even though I was awaked by a cloudburst, I tried not to get entirely out of sleep and I kept trying to get back to it, explaining to myself that here I am on holiday and I should get some rest.  It’s the first morning in many weeks when I don’t need to be in a hurry.

Today – the highlight is my youngest Sister’s Birthday. Round anniversary, so even more special. Today I’m also going to have my cassock cleaned – it got a bit worn-out from travelling. I should also buy some warm clothes, because I didn’t manage to pack my suitcase for all seasons of the year. And here it’s November-like weather. When I was leaving Poland, the snow on the Warsaw pavements stayed behind. I landed in the middle of hot summer in between, and now it’s already autumn. Time passes by so quickly. I only must have lost the spring somewhere on the way. 🙁

But the first objective of today was to visit Lord Jesus present in Eucharist. Today, as on every Thursday, in one of the local parishes there is the exposition of the Holy Sacrament. So we turn up for adoration.

The church on the top of the hill has in it a window located right behind the altar. From that window you’ve got the view of the whole vicinity.

It’s the first time I’ve seen such an idea for the chancel design. You have to look at the world outside through the Altar and Lord Jeusus. As if He didn’t want to stop our sight just on Himself, but invited us to see the world through His eyes. The Church is not the place of flight from the “bad” world, but the place where we learn to see the world from the right perspective.

I liked it here a lot. I was happy to stay here and adore the Holy Sacrament. I didn’t feel like leaving this place.

For tomorrow I’ve scheduled a day of prayer and reflection. Until the evening, because then I’ll celebrate the Mass and give a talk to the local Polish community. But before that, I want to spend some time face to face with Lord Jesus. I need it after so many meetings with people. I need to tell Him about all that happened. And this possibility of seeing the world through the Lord – inspired me greatly.

Remembering you always,

ks. Jarosław

– or Praying Mantis Club. The tradition of Wrocław, Poland. Yesterday again.

For how many years have we met in the company of wives? We tried to count, but even though women have a detailed mamory for EVERYTHING, we didn’t manage.

When I call the restaurant to book a table and I say: for 9 women, the man I’m talking to understands what I mean when I’m asking for a quiet place somewhere aside. Then, I and Dear Jacket are desperately trying to find an-impossible-to-find-on-friday-evening parking place and I have to call him again to keep the table for us – and he understands, too.

And he keeps calm when he’s waiting for us to place an order – and we are talking all at once and to one another, multiplying anegdotes on the subject of  parking the car, drinking wine and calories*. We’re not worried that half the items listed in the menu are unavailable and simply not there.  It’s important that WE are here. Wearing high-heeled shoes and necklaces, because it is our time, when it’s not our usual turn to serve the table. Even though we love our Families very much, we need to feel – from time to time – like princesses.

Halfway through the meeting we’re joined by a friend of ours, who’s just driven from another city, 100 km away. A couple of years ago, in similar company, we bid farewell to her, because their whole family was leaving for Manchester, UK. We promised we would visit her. And so we did. The Praying Mantis Club conquered Manchester, too.

After several hours the waiter is asking if we need anything else. And we say, no, thank you, we’re fine. But I wouldn’t like to have you seating at an empty table, he insists. – But we have our mouths full… of words – Danusia replies.

With warmest regards from Poland for a change,

Margaret

*Do you know what calories are? Marta explained it to us: Calories are little dwarves who take in our dresses at the waist while we’re asleep. 

The traditional dinner out for the Faculty on the last day before the end of Education Program took place yesterday at DJ’s Dugout Sports Bar.

As soon as you go in, you feel the place was created with you in mind. Loud music, which virtually makes any conversation impossible, and all the walls covered with screens showing all possible sports. Too loud to talk, so you can just “sit around” over the fastfood meal and watch lazily all the screens, not having to bother to switch the channels. In one word: perfect masculine world.

I look at the tables nearby and it turns out that women have come here, too. They don’t mind the tv screens, or the noise, because they have more important thing to be concerned about – conversation. How different it is from the “men’s” tables, where you generally just look in front of you. And if any conversation happens, it is to comment what’s on the screen.

Two worlds. Different and interesting. To understand each of them, to put them together to form one entity – that’s a lifetime adventure. And it’s worth lifetime.

From Omaha, noisy today

Fr. Jay

I mentioned earlier that some of you won’t be able to go on vacation at all, or managed to spend just one week at the seaside, 5 days of wich were rainy. What then? I think that really much depends on our imagination. I know families who visited all the museums in town during vacation, enjoying those lessons in history and culture a lot.

I know one Dad who set off on a expedition with his little sonny: they made supper on the campfire and slept in the tent. In their own garden. A child doesn’t need to cover hundreds of kilometers to have the sense of a wonderful adventure.

I know a family in which the oldest sister prepares a quiz each week for her younger siblings. She comes up on her own with the rules and questions for the game, and her brothers and sisters simply can’t wait! And you? What are your ideas for vacation full of adventure?

I am going to an art museum. There’s a great exhibition of Dutch painting.

With warmest regards,

xj

– the two last dives early this morning. The first one included visiting our Lord Jesus, whose statue is located next to one of the most beautiful Key Largo coral reefs. You can see the sculpture here.

As my course mates were not with me this time, I had to find myself a buddy to dive with. Another diver had the same problem, so we made a good match. We started from seeing the statue, and then went on to admire the reef life.

It was first time ever I’d seen a turtle under the water. It moved with an awesome elegance and speed, which was surprising when you bear in mind its proverbial pace. We accompanied the turtle for a while, to be left behind quite soon. Then the meeting with a shark – amazing as usual. It let us swim quite close, unlike a barracude which showed clearly we had invaded her comfort zone. We were swimming for some time surrounded by a shoal od fish, feeling we were tolerated, but still alien to their world.

It was a beautiful farewell.

But it was also interesting to experience how we – the participants of that excursion – changed. When we got on the boat, we greeted one another, as the Americans do. It was quite different after we finished diving. We engaged into an emotional exchange of impressions, hearing also the voices of a real “divers’ envy” – that we’d seen a turtle and a shark, and they had not. Some divers approached us to say “thank you” for showing them the way to the statue, which they could not find themselves. Well, you are a priest also under the water.

Passion brings people together, common experiences are vital for your unity. So you need a common ground. Now it’s time of vacation. It’s good to do something together: only a husband and a wife. For yourselves. To feel one.

Keeping you in my memory and prayer,

Fr Jay