new wine into old wineskins

“People do not put new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise the skins burst, the wine spills out, and the skins are ruined. Rather, they pour new wine into fresh wineskins, and both are preserved.” (MT 9: 17)

Assisting and coaching couples for so many years, I found many times they make the same mistakes, trying to “put new wine into old wineskins.” They have just one solution for every problem; it worked for so many years, so why not to use it again? It could be an emotional blackmail or silent days, punishing through avoiding intimacy or fights and many similar tactics. Every marriage needs new skills, “fresh wineskins,” like a new form of expressing respect and gentleness, new surprises showing free, creative and joyful gift of self, or new rituals which can change with our years together. There are so many “fresh wineskins” we can install in our relationship.

“My sheep hear my voice, says the Lord; I know them, and they follow me.” (Gospel Acclamation)